Oct 20, 2015

Regenerating/Powering Up

There is only one thing you can be absolutely sure about in life. That's life. It never fucking stops moving. For anyone. No one is above or beyond it. Life goes on. Whether you want to hang on for the ride or not, it'll not give a fuck and just keep going on.

That said, there are always minor shocks, trials and tribulations, all sorts of shit that might or might not have anything to do with you, but it's in your path, so either you change your path or you step through it. I think everyone should go through some shit every now and then, it allows you to take an inward look and see what the fuck you've been doing wrong and right.

While you're wading (?) through that pool of shit, the stink overpowering and the shit sucking the shoes off your feet, you'll think to yourself, what the fuck am i doing with my life? Is this what the fuck I want to do? Is this my full potential? Am I living or just fucking existing? When will this pool of shit end? Did I just leave my shoe two steps behind me? Am I going to get my hands dirty picking up that one shoe or am I going to keep walking with one shoe and one foot drenched to the pores in shit? So many questions and often these questions have no answers.
this babe is also contemplating the sea of shit that she has to step through
All you can do is walk. Walk hard and fast and focus on the light, whatever little it might be at the horizon and maybe at the end of the sea of shit that you're walking through. What I am trying to say is that I've walked through my sea of metaphorical shit, maybe I am still going through it, but I am not going to fucking stop. 

November is NaNoWriMo again. I am going to write one more novel again again. There are three in my dropbox folder at the last count. I never got around to editing them. And I don't think I will either. That was just practice. But I've had enough of that. I am sick to my gills of the present market scene in India for fiction and it has finally dawned on me that I, and only I, will have to do something about it. No promises, but, fuck me, if I don't get something done. You know what it's going to be. Yup. 

I have to write more.